Sunday, January 16, 2011

Thank you. OK now stop.

I have a week left of visitors. I hope they aren't expecting to "do" anything. I feel like I hired-a-friend. I get to start picking up Atlas tomorrow! I also intend on going back to cleaning and blogging and being a wife and mom.

I am exhausted with being "needy" and I am ready to get back up.

I have a hard time accepting help anyhow, I am also not the kind of girl who can sit on her hands and be spoon-fed. I need movement. I am like a service dog. I need a job. I need a reason and a purpose. I have one. It has been waiting on me. I have just been on hold for life for the past few weeks, which seems more like years.

I dont understand how some people can expect to be babied, spoiled or given handouts. Dont they get bored? Or just jaded? Whatever it is, it is NOT for me.

I will say this: I am humbled and I am accepting humility. I know that I am only one human and I am far from super no matter how hard I try to look indestructible. I cry. Not like THAT is some sort of new revelation... but I have bawled like a 4-year-old many times in the past 2 months. I am not ashamed to admit it. I am proud to say that I have a husband who is a true man who can put up with pretty much anything. I know. I also have amazing women in my life. My MIL has had her fair share (and then 6 other peoples share) of medical issues over the past few years and she pushed through and never mentioned any pain she felt in her back... even after she ran out of her pain medication. My own mom has done anything and everything we have needed and absolutely loved every minute of it.

I am grateful for the help, but I am SO ready for everyone to go back to their lives and things to just go back to normal.