Sunday, March 20, 2011

Connecting in the Mainstream

I had a light bulb moment today at a 1-year-old mainstreamed child's birthday.

I am FAR from AP. I learn from you all and I take in what seems to be a good idea, I soak up the tips and try them all. I respect you guys who are all crunchy and thriving in APing (attachment parenting, google it.) There are some things that work for us and some that don't. I listen and then move on.

But today I realized how much more AP I am than I thought I was. I have had a few moments like this, but it wasn't until today that I really *got it.*

Not all SAHMs are AP, but most AP moms are SAHM not to say they aren't working outside of the home at times or are anti-daycare. Not that that was the bright light... more on the way parents acted and *PLAYED* with their kids.

I suppose the parents want to mingle and do other things, after all it IS a 1-year-old's birthday party. :-\

Today I understood the communicating with your child. It isn't just ECing or wearing or not letting them CIO.

This was further evident after reading an article a friend posted on facebook.

I would be the last person to ever feel entitled to ANYTHING... but being a mother (or father) really does give you a secret language with your child. I feel as if our child is entitled to us REALLY listening. We invited them into this world and we shouldn't just wait for them to "get it." They already do. it is US that needs to "get them."

I feel so fortunate to stay at home and care for Atlas. There are a good 8 or 9 extra hours a day that he gets to know me. It DOES make it easier when ECing (btw he is finally pooping on the potty again!) and when wearing.

I found it almost tiresome when everyoneeeeeeeeeeee asked how old he was and when he started walking. The birthday boy wasn't walking. And I know that they do this on their own at their own timing... but we REALLY DID work with him a LOT and pushed walking... lol! It's not like he would have done it had he not wanted to.

I found myself defending my son's achievements in the mainstream. "wow that's kinda young..." I would say "Oh we pushed him to keep up with his cousin." And that is the truth. And I also dont think that was wrong to do. I am home with him all day long. My JOB in life is him... and if we have the time to walk or sit on the potty or learn sign language... then we do.

Sure, some mainstreamers do too. But you know as well as I do, not as many of them. It's kinda like the whole "omg you home-birthed, you're crazy."

I only feel like an outsider when I am mainstreaming. I guess I am more AP than I thought.

Atlas - T-minus-5-days